Welcome! All American Mommy is a positive place where you'll read about people and companies that are making a difference. Search around and I know you'll find inspiring stories, yummy recipes, parenting advice, fun giveaways and great new product reviews.
CONTACT:
allamericanmommy@gmail.com

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Sanity?


To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity:
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice!
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks . Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso.
5. In the Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write For Marijuana.
6. Skip down the hall Rather Than Walk and see how many looks you get.
7. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
8. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is 'To Go'.
9. Sing Along At The Opera.
10. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You have a headache.
11. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream ' I Won! I Won!'
12. When Leaving the Zoo, Start Running towards the Parking lot, Yelling 'Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!'
13. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, 'Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.'

3 comments:

Fiona said...

These are hilarious!!!! THanks ... I think i'll use the last one on my kids!

Misadventurous Mommy said...

This is the funniest list I think I've ever read...the last one is so getting put to use nest time my kids show their butts!

The Jacobsen Family! said...

SO FUNNY! I love this!
Have you done any yet? =)